Karma, drama and what comes between.

Today I was going to write a blog about how epic my summer of self-care has been thus far…but that will just have to wait. Needed to get this out of my brain…

So…today I took part 1 of a 2 part training class: Nonviolent Crisis Intervention [AKA Restraint Class]. Although none of my current clients have ever shown violent or harming behaviors, in this field knowing proper restraints can save your ass when shit hits the fan…not to mention the safety piece.  I was surprised to learn that we would not be taught a single restraint the first day…only behavioral prevention. The number one goal is control (of your clients; yourself; and strangers in the community). We all agreed this sounds crude, and it very well can be…however, when used with clients best interest at heart, control is ok.

The overall idea was that we all come to this job with a certain ‘bag of tricks’ which manifests either verbally or physically. Physical aspects include proximity and body language (and many more)…people notice this stuff…you have the power to completely change the mood of a room just by body language!! I also learned a five step process to get people to do things they do not want to do, using verbal strategies…this can be used in every part of your life with any person (try me). I gave cheesy examples after each step…I’m pretending I’m trying to get someone to stop playing video games and go to sleep…examples are bold.

1. Give sincere compliments (Who-da thunk it…people like you when you say nice things?!?!) You are playing your favorite video game again, AWESOME! You rock at this game!
2. Ask genuine questions (Note that you are never an expert in someone else’s life!!) Wait now, tell me what is going on again…I never remember all the rules like you.
3. Present choices (No one likes to be bossed around, no matter their age, ability or whatever else) Cool, well it sucks you have to stop playing, had you rather finish up the game first thing tomorrow morning or after dinner tomorrow night?

Ok, so here is where the karma piece comes in.  I admit, this all seems a bit idealistic…but when used to benefit another it goes a long way and carries over in the form of…KARMA! The instructor said every time you do this GENUINELY it’s like putting a coin in you karma piggy bank. Maybe that’s why his process works with the most violent clients, in some of the most stressful situations…hmmm. So…the moral of the story is: Be nice, be genuine and don’t go around telling people what to do! People will listen to you when you also give them a voice. It’s like killing two birds with one stone…you give a person respect and options while also rackin-up karma points.

I also feel the need to vent my personal philosophy on drama, karma and what falls between.  I truly believe we determine our own fate…all the time. Today’s training only further planted that seed. We must remember that NO ONE is as concerned with your well-being as you…we are selfish beings and that’s ok. Avoid drama through communication…avoiding drama improves karma. The most important thing to me is RESPECT. Respect everyone. The strongest people (in my opinion) are able to recognize that no one cares as much about their well-being as others…and respects that fact. Respect even the person who disrespect you…Karma doesn’t care who started it.

I hope this all makes sense…?